Friday, December 16, 2011

Family and the holidays

The week of finals in a high school is exciting and stressing. Lots of pressure schmeered with holiday cheer and red and green sprinkles. It is a time to give gifts - I got lots of chocolate. It is a time to say good bye until the new year. It is a time when the questions are always in air, "so, what are you doing for the holidays? Are you going anywhere?"
Personally I am hoping to make it to some mountain somewhere.
A colleague of mine when learning that my parents were neither coming out to see me nor was I going to see them looked at me like I was such a terrible person. And then She proceeded to tell me that I was one. I was at first in shock and then I began to believe i was a terrible person.
Today, after the last grade was entered, I strolled round the building to say some good byes to those who were left. And again with the questions.
Exchanging pleasantries with a coworker with whom I don't have many conversations proved to be a bonding experience. I asked her if she was traveling anywhere and she said, "no. My family lives in X but I am not going there. I don't have those same gooey feelings about family and holidays that others do. People look at me like I am defunct. But holidays were never fun for me. At least once during the season my mother would lock herself in the bedroom threatening to kill herself and crying about how our father ruined our lives."

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